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Writer's pictureDr. Virginia Ward

Build Your House!

The request of the federal government and various state officials for individuals to stay in place has placed extra weight on families. This season of the home as the base of operations for work, school and play has revealed the strength and weaknesses of our families. A house is built on the shoulders of fathers and mothers. As a mother I am choosing to address the biblical responsibilities of women in building their house.

Proverbs 14:1 “Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.”


Proverbs 9:1 “Wisdom hath buildeth her house, she hath hewn out her seven pillars:”


Proverbs 24:3-4 “Through wisdom is an house builded; and by understanding it is established: and by knowledge shall the chambers be filled with all precious and pleasant riches.”


Psalms 127:1 Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it:  except the Lord keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain.”


What is a house? According to The American Heritage Dictionary, a house is a structure serving as a dwelling for one or more persons, especially for a family.You probably have a very specific mental image of the typical house. It is a structure on its own piece of land, generally with a lawn and plants outside. It has a pitched roof, walls covered in brick or siding, windows and doors. Inside there are rooms like the kitchen, the living room, bedrooms and bathrooms.


Building a house entails making something by joining parts to make a structure by putting the parts of it together. It also includes forming or developing something, or in this case, someone.


When you are trying to build a physical house, you should have a dream, hire an architect to design your dream and obtain financing. Once the outside components of your house are decided the next step is to determine the spiritual and natural parts of your house.


  • Foundation:  What are the non-negotiable rules in your house?  Is God the corner stone all the time or just on Sundays and when you pray over meals?  Can people come in any time they want to?  Do your children have responsibilities around the house?  Are there consequences to broken rules?

  • Systems:  What keeps your house going?  Some of the systems include people communicating to each other in healthy ways, mealtimes together, respect for all individuals in the family and clear understanding of the roles and duties of all family members.

  • Bearing walls:  These walls are essential to the maintenance of your family.  Bearing walls carry the weight of the house. Without healthy bearing walls, the house is not safe. The bearing walls include prayer, presence and patience. Our constant communication with God on behalf of our loved ones keeps our hearts focused on God’s plan. Being present physically, spiritually, emotionally and mentally for the people in your house is important.  Please don’t discount your own needs as you are reaching out to others. You cannot give from a dry well. Patience with our families reminds us that our houses are constant building improvement projects. Let’s be in it for the long haul.

Your house did not get where it is overnight. It will take time to build the house of a wise woman.  The foolish woman’s house was destroyed quickly. This is not quick or easy work. Parenting is hard. Doing it God’s way is even harder.  Take your time and allow God to lead you. 


The question I want to leave with you is: what type of house do you want to build?

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